He Ain’t Heavy; He’s Our Brother

The Shut Up Brother pictured center with the Shut Up Family.

If you’ve been following this blog for any length of time, you’ve probably learned a lot about our imperfect family. You’ve met our imperfect children, parents, spouses, dogs (one of whom chews expensive electronic appliances), imaginary friends, etc. But you haven’t met one important family member — our brother Bob. Bob is the middle child (though clearly not the disturbed one as Patty has cornered that title), sandwiched between his two imperfect sisters. Bob is  unique from us in that he has many talents, including playing the guitar, drawing, and keeping his hair well maintained (something that has alluded us since birth). He is also the smartest child in the family though we really haven’t given him much competition.  Since you know more about the two of us than you’d ever hoped to know (including what we’re doing every minute of every day), we thought it would be appropriate to let you get to know Bob, as well. So we decided to conduct an imperfect interview with the man we call Bro.

Bob, what do you think is your biggest imperfection besides the fact that you have us for sisters?

Well, I’ve been known to talk too much when I’m nervous. (Obviously Bob was very comfortable with us because he didn’t expand on that answer.)

Bob, we really want our readers to get a sense for you. Tell us (if it’s not too personal), what is your favorite color?

I’ve given it a lot of thought and I’d have to say, it’s blue. (Clearly, our brother is a man of excellent taste.)

Yo Bro, if you could be stranded on a desert island with one thing, what would it be?

It would be my acoustic guitar with a set of unbreakable strings. (We would have said a box of wine and Facebook, but hey, who are we to judge?”)

Bob, our inquiring readers are dying to know, which Shut Up Sister is your favorite?

I love both my sisters for their wonderful qualities AND their many imperfections. (What a great answer! We told you he was smart. We think he’d make a fine politician.)

Bob, speaking of imperfections, when did you first realize we were imperfect?

Well, Patty, I noticed in the sandbox. She could yack your ear off and spare no small detail. (Hmm, maybe this explains why the other children always dumped sand on her head.)

“And Gina at times has to really focus on listening to someone, especially without losing concentration because she has a question she wants to ask.” (Gina has a question. What did Bob just say? She wasn’t listening.)

Bob, thank you for taking time out of your busy life to share your thoughts with us. Imperfect fans feel free to post a question for Bob. You can ask weight and math-related questions to him. Just don’t ask us.