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Since we’ve been traveling the country speaking, we’ve become familiar with many different types of mental health conditions and disabilities. We’re thrilled to have gained this knowledge, though our husbands think we take things too far. “What do you mean you’ve diagnosed the Fed Ex man with OCD? He has to get  your signature.”  We’ve even applied this knowledge to our dogs, Max and Rocky. Patty is convinced Rocky has an eating disorder and Gina is convinced her dog Max has Asperger’s.

“Pat, do you ever notice Max doesn’t look you in the eye when you talk to him? I think he’s an Aspie.”

“Gene, don’t be ridiculous. He doesn’t have Asperger’s. He’s just stealing from you.”

We actually do believe  some dogs suffer from anxiety and depression, and were not at all surprised to learn that there are actually medicines to treat them. Check out the article below that discusses how Doggie Prozac has helped dogs with separation anxiety.

Have you diagnosed one of your pets with a mental health issue or disability? Tell us about it.

http://teddyhilton.com/2011-10-11-puppy-prozac-helps-dogs-deal-with-separation-anxiety/?from=PH

We’ve said it before and we’ll say it again, neither of us are fans of change. Specifically, the ones we’ve both been experiencing over the past few years. “Mommy, please turn off the air conditioning. It’s snowing outside.”  Our latest concern is regarding the 2007 legislation that will replace the incandescent  lightbulb. We have two pressing questions over the new lightbulb changes coming, including:

1) Will we still see incandescent lightbulbs over our heads when we have a good idea?

2) And most importantly, what will become of the Easy Bake Oven, which is powered by incandescent lightbulbs?

While our calls to the U.S. Government about the first question have remained unanswered, we do have clarification on the second question. It appears that Hasbro, makers of the Easy Bake Oven, have redesigned the oven to offer an alternate source of heat — a 100-watt space heater. That’s not all. While they were tinkering under the hood, they decided to re-vamp the outside and give it a fun, trendy new look. Clearly, this is “not your mother’s Easy Bank Oven,” though our mother never had one. We’re not sure if that’s why she never bought us one. Whatever her reason, she did us a disservice. Sometimes it’s hard not to be bitter and think about what our lives might have become had we possessed one.

“Pat, if I had one back then, I probably wouldn’t call the kids to dinner by telling them to get in the car.”

“I hear you Gina. And I’d probably be competing on Bravo’s Top Lightbulb Chef, too.”

Well, since our mother’s passing, we realized that we are adults (at least by age anyway), and decided that it’s time we flew on our own. As a result, we will be purchasing a new Easy Bake Oven. We were so excited, we even told our father.

“Dad, guess which two people are cooking Thanksgiving dinner?”

Sounds like a brilliant idea to us. And speaking of brilliant ideas, did you see a squiggly or incandescent lightbulb over our heads when we came up with it?

Let’s face it, we’re all human. Well most of us are, except for some the pets and imaginary friends that are on our Facebook page. And in being human, it’s not uncommon for us to feel sorry for ourselves when things don’t work out the way we planned for us or our children. On these occasions, it’s not uncommon for us to throw a pity party. Our most recent blog for Psychology Today discusses the pity party phenomenon. Check it out.  Be sure to leave a comment.

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/shut-about-your-perfect-kid/201109/put-your-party-pants-were-having-pity-party

Do you frequently host/attend pity parties?

Step aside, Snuggie fans. There’s a new product to hit the lounge wear scene — the Forever Lazy. It looks like a Snuggie, but it’s actually an ultra-soft fleece pantsuit.  We have to admit, the Forever Lazy does address some of the design flaws of the Snuggie.  For example, the pant legs offer protection from Snuggie stair accidents. Imperfect studies have shown that 7 out of 10 Snuggie wearers end up tripping down the stairs when they wear their Snuggies to the football stadium (though it could be because someone pushed them).  In addition, the tapered sleeves will help eliminate stove burner accidents.

Rumor has it that the Forever Lazy even comes equipped with a pocket for Bon-Bons. Thus far, the reviews have been stellar. Even the monk community has broken its silence on the new product. “It’s not fair! We had to stay quiet to get our robes. Snuggie people can just pick them up at the store. It’s about time someone did something about that.”

Of course, the best feature is that there are no embarrassing “Snuggie moons,” since the back is fully closed up.

Watch the Forever Lazy video now.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5S2p7AiNX9g

What do you think? Will you purchase a Forever Lazy?

Start the presses! We’ve got a new bumper sticker idea — I May Have Survived Hurricane Irene. It wasn’t the high winds, torrential downpours, or menacing sky that made the task so challenging. It was actually the loss of power, or more specifically, our children dealing with the loss of power.

“Oh My God Mom!” I can’t take it!” shouted my sixteen year old, Katie, on the verge of a full blown panic attack.

“I know, Honey, the wind is pretty scary, isn’t it?”

“It’s not the wind. It’s my laptop. There’s no Internet access!”

“Yeah Mom, and I can’t AIM or text. I won’t have any friends left. I’m doomed,” said my youngest.

“What do we do?” they asked, panicked.

“Well, we can play games or better yet, we can talk.”

“Talk! How can we talk? We have no Internet!”

“Ah, girls, I meant to your father and me”

“Oh God!” sobbed Katie.

“Girls, I’m sure it’s just temporary,” I said, reassuring them the best I could. “We’ll probably have our power back in a few hours.”

“A few hours? I can’t wait that long! We may as well just move because I won’t have any friends left.”

I don’t know what they were thinking. It certainly wasn’t easy on me, either. I’m as connected as the next dysfunctional, Facebook addicted person. Though, fortunately I had another way to stay occupied — a method that was quite foreign to them.

“Reading Mom, really? I hope you don’t expect us to do that.”

It seemed like a good plan, until their constant interruptions made concentrating impossiblet. “Mom, is the power back yet? Isn’t it, huh?”

“Why don’t you girls go upstairs and visit your father?” I asked.

“We can’t. He’s sound asleep.”

After his fitful sleep (about 8 hours), my husband came downstairs all nice and apologetic.

“Thanks for letting me sleep, Gene. By the way, you look really pretty.”

“Mike just so you know, you may want to tell me that when the house is not in a blackout.”

Fortunately, we managed to get the kids to sleep with the promise of a new, power-full day on a Monday. That is until 7:30 a.m. this morning when I was awakened by that painful shriek from Katie upon realizing that things had not changed.

“Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?”

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We received this wonderful article from a parent of a daughter with Asperger’s. If you have something you’d like us to share, contact us at info@shutupabout.com.

Imagine for a moment a person who has grown up in a family where they only ever had pet dogs.  Their friends and neighbours had pet dogs – all different breeds, colours and temperaments, but still, fundamentally, dogs.  They all went to the dog park together every afternoon and always had a raucously good time.  They had never, ever, ever seen a cat.  Not once.

Then one day they stumble upon an adorable looking creature that is cute, furry, has a black wet nose, four paws and whiskers and for all intents and purposes, looks exactly like the type of friendly, willing to please dog they had known and loved all their lives.  Its tail is waving to and fro in what is perceived to be a welcoming gesture so they go over, ruffle up its soft fur and attempt to roll it over to scratch its belly, anticipating their affectionate gesture will be delightfully received.  Only it’s not a dog, it’s a cat, and their interaction is interpreted very differently.  Lets just say, fur will fly and it will fly furiously.

Welcome to the world of a child with Asperger’s Syndrome.  A solitary cat, surviving in a room full of boisterous dogs.  Its every move being analysed, interpreted and modified based on the framework of rules, behavioural patterns and ingrained habits of the canine species.  And as a result, being disastrously misunderstood.

Dogs wag their tails as a sign of happiness and anticipation of social interaction.  Cats swish their tails as a warning to back off and give them much needed space.  Dogs always welcome affection in whatever way it is offered to them.  Cats will also offer heartfelt affection but it needs to on their terms, at a time that suits them.  Sometimes they just need to be left alone. Dogs depend on your approval for their emotional wellbeing.  Cats depend on certain things being in place in a routine that they can depend on, and will then reward your reliability with their unwavering friendship.

Dogs are inherently social.  They are pack animals with deeply entrenched hierarchical rules of canine society and as a result are desperately eager to please, and occasionally challenge, the pack leader.  As puppies, they will romp and play delightedly with their littermates until they fall into an exhausted, but happy heap on top of each other at the end of the day.  They rarely turn down an offer of affection and will warmly greet their family with furry hugs and sloppy kisses when they get home.

On the surface, cats may seem more aloof, but cat lovers around the world will be quick to tell you they are always keenly observing every detail and will reward those who take the time to understand them with warmth, affection, loyalty and love.  Dogs are less discriminating in whom they shower with their boundless love, and this is part of their universal appeal, but it is a trait that cats simply don’t understand  or tolerate.  Their love needs to be earned.

Dogs enthusiastically learn new tricks and are keen to show them off to gain further approval.  Cats have extraordinary agility and mysterious extra-sensory skills, but will only display them when the circumstances dictate they are necessary.  They need to be coaxed out and encouraged or will remain hidden forever.

Cats may not always look you in the eye, but they can see straight into your soul and will quietly commune with you while you process the problems of your world.   Dogs will sense your unhappiness but may not fully understand it, so will entice you to capture some of their perpetual joy by grabbing their lead and making you take them for a walk to cheer you up.  Their destination may be the same, but their journey could not be more different.

If you whistle for a cat to come to you, try to wrangle a leash onto its collar, drag it outside for a walk and hope it will thank you for letting it romp around the dog park then you are both doomed to crumple in a heap of confused despair. Simply said, cats are wired differently to dogs.  They are not better or worse. Just different.

So if you want to understand my child with Asperger’s Syndrome, try to think of her as a cat in a room full of dogs, and you will be a lot closer to coaxing out her unique gifts, helping her understand social behavior that she may otherwise find bewildering, and maybe in time her gorgeous, eager to please peers will gain a greater appreciation of the grace, beauty and uniqueness that bestows her, just like her feline doppelgänger.

Our special kids now have an angel in Heaven, our beautiful mother, Viola.

For those who are unaware, this past weekend, we lost our beautiful mother due to complications from routine heart surgery. Though we fight against perfection, our mother was the perfect mother for us. She was always there to support us and her grandchildren, including Jennifer, Katie, and Emily, her special grandchildren. Our mother was especially proud of our work with the book, and would often accompany us, along with our father, to our various talks throughout the state of Massachusetts. She loved to meet special parents, hear their stories, and offer them an ear and a warm embrace. Since our mother was such a big force in our lives and the lives of so many others, we wanted to honor her by posting her eulogy (see below). The eulogy was given by Patty’s oldest child, Julianne, who delivered it beautifully. We encourage you to read it and to take the time to tell us about the special parent or parent figure in your life.  Thank you all for your continued  support. If you wish to honor our mother or to support us, please spread The Movement of Imperfection by sharing with the world the many gifts of special children. Thank you.

Gina and Patty

Eulogy for Viola Terrasi given by Julianne Konjoian, her oldest grandchild.

A vibrant flower. A finely tuned instrument. A radiant and proud woman. That’s the definition of the name Viola, rare and elegant like my beloved grandmother who held it. My grandmother never liked her name; she wanted a name that was easily recognized like those of her sisters, Angie, Anne, Mary, and Nanci.

But her name was not common, nor was my grandmother.

To anyone who knew Viola, it’s hard to imagine this day would ever come. For to think of my grandmother was to think of life. Her beautiful smile, her sparkling blue eyes, her warm embraces, even her perfectly coifed head. She had always been the portrait of beauty, life, good health, and youth, something she was quite proud of. For example, it wasn’t uncommon for her to act like a giddy school when asked to show her ID to get the coveted senior discount.

But her pride went far beyond her youth and appearance. There was nothing that made her prouder than her family. If she wasn’t talking about Bob’s musical ability, she was bragging about Gina and Patty’s book. In fact, she made selling books her life’s work. She once sold two books to a telemarketer who called to sell her windows. And could usually be found lurking in bookstores secretly placing her daughter’s book in the Oprah’s Top Picks section.

From the time they were little until the time of her death, my grandmother was a vital part of her children’s lives. She was the only mother who attended her son Bob’s Men’s League Hockey game.  And once got into a fight in the stands with an opposing husband at one of Gina’s adult basketball games. She was beaming with pride about Patty’s videography skills and was most impressed when Patty filmed a torn seam in her carpeting to file a complaint with the rug company. If you were a friend of one of her children, she not only made it a point to meet you, but to embrace you, get to know you, and make you feel special.

Her love for her children extended to me and her six other grandchildren. Nana always made us feel special, greeting us with a warm smile and open arms and then grabbing our cheeks to tell us how cute we were. Her love for us was never shown more than when she experienced the challenges of learning two of her grandchildren, Jennifer and Katie, had disabilities. She, who grew up at a time when disabilities were not discussed, became not only their advocates but advocates for all children with special needs. At Gina and Patty’s talks, she could be found embracing parents of special needs children to offer them comfort, support,  and love.

It’s not surprising given my  grandmother’s tremendous heart.

When her sisters, in laws, nieces and nephews, friends, and neighbors were in need. or were celebrating a life milestone, Vi was the first one to pick up the phone or to mail a card. This rare thoughtfulness was shown the week before her surgery when we discovered a birthday card for her son-in-law Mike made out a week before his birthday. She underlined the words that described her love for him.

Anyone who came in contact with her could see that my grandmother embodied the definition of extrovert; she was a natural connector, bringing together people with each other and with God and her beloved St. Theresa. She said the St. Theresa novena for friends and family members in need and constantly told us of seeing roses that proved her prayers were heard often telling us, “You’ll never believe this, I turned on the TV and there on the table of the soap opera was a beautiful rose.”

There was no one this natural born connector connected better with than her husband Tony of 53 years. Whether they were gracefully waltzing on the dance floor at a wedding, walking the fairways of Twin Springs golf course, or spending time watching a grandchild perform, they were always the perfect match even when it came to their clothes.

My grandfather always told his children that marriage was about giving 110%. That was my grandmother, always giving of herself to make her husband happy. If she wasn’t cooking him delicious and healthy meals, she was picking out his clothes, and reminding him to take his vitamins.  When she found out she was going to have her operation, she was more concerned for his health. “Please watch out for your father. Make sure he goes for his walks and eats healthy. Don’t let him fry everything.”

My grandmother was the first to tell you that she wasn’t strong. Yet, in the weeks and final moments leading up to her surgery, she was a tower of strength. Her beautiful humor shined through even as she was preparing to be taken in for her surgery.  When the nurse went to place a surgical cap over her head, she joked,  “Don’t mess the hair!”

Though my grandmother’s death was shocking and seemed unfair, please do not be sad for her. Upon the sudden death of Gina’s mother-in-law, she said. “If I go suddenly like that, do not cry for me. That’s how I want to go. I don’t want to be sick and grow feeble.”

So grandmother, we’re happy that you have your wish. It’s ironic that you who loved so much, ultimately died from a heart that was too full.

And though you were taken too soon in our eyes, you will forever remain beautiful and youthful in our minds. And you will be reunited with your mother and father and brother and sister who you so beautifully honored in life.  And  of course, you will find  roses for all who still need you on earth in the greatest garden of all – the garden of heaven.

I would like to end by borrowing from my younger cousins who used to always spell her name on the birthday cards they made for her and choose an adjective for each letter.

V – is for vibrant

I –  is for illuminating

O – is original

L  – is for loving

A – is for amazon.com, where you can purchase her daughters’ book.

Rest in peace sweet grandmother, Viola. Your light in our lives — and in this world – will live on forever.

Image via Wikipedia

Looks like America’s scary biker girl next door, Kat Von D., has a bit of a problem. Apparently, while engaged to Jesse James, she got a permanent ink tattoo of James as a fifth grader. Now that the two have broken up, she’s stuck with it, making her not smarter than a fifth grader.

We guess this is nothing compared to the woman who tattooed the name of all  her Facebook friends on her body. Hopefully, no one unfriended her.

Do you have tattoos and if so what do you have?  We don’t have tattoos, though we did dabble in those Cracker Jack ones as kids.

Image via Wikipedia

Growing up as sisters, we shared a childhood bedroom. With our vast age difference (Patty is old enough to be Gina’s mother), we really had little in common except that we couldn’t stand each other. We were constantly fighting and looking for ways to make the other look bad. Gina, for example, used to hang Patty’s bra out the window and yell “My sister wears a bra.”  Though we threw our share of insults at each other, we never did what the lady in the article below did to her roommate. And it’s not just because we used margerine in our home.

What about you? Did you attempt to butter up a sibling growing up?

Image via Wikipedia

Sad news for Buzz Aldrin fans. It appears that the profession of astronaut is no longer on the Top 10 list of things kids want to be when they grow up. We, however, would love to be astronauts.

“Pat, is it true, you weigh nothing in space?”

“I think it is Gene. And you can space out anytime without anyone noticing.”

The list is as follows for kids ages 6-12.

1.    Doctor
2.    Vet
3.    Athlete
4.    Pop Singer
5.    Firefighter
6.    Police Officer
7.    Pilot
8.    Actor
9.    Spy
10.    Model/Dietitian

Our list would look something like this.

1. Pharmacist – Needs no explanation
2. Bartender – Ditto
3. Imperfect Reality TV star – There are no lines to memorize.
4. Psychiatrist – We could write our own scripts.
5. Neuropsychologist – We’d save about $5000 bucks.
6. Hypnotist – We could make our children do what they want to do.
7. Clown – We could act goofy and get paid.
8. Monk – We could live in silence.
9. Letter Turner – Seems pretty hard to mess up.
10. Circus performer — we love to get out of the house.

What would be on your list?

Image by Getty Images via @daylife

Over the years, we’ve been amazed at the items people have been able to sell on eBay. We thought the Dorito chip that looked like the Pope was the most impressive, until we came across this item. It appears that the fame-whoring father of “Balloon Boy,” the creator of that scheme to let the world think his son was launched in a balloon, is now selling the balloon.  That’s right for the cool sum of $1 million, you could own this piece of latex history. Anyone interested?

BTW — if this ploy works, look for the Shut Up Sisters to launch their kids in a balloon.

Image via Wikipedia

Bad news for Snooki fans. It appears that the Jersey Shore star got herself into a fender bender in Italy, where they are filming the show. (Can you say International Incident?).  Not only did she send two people to the hospital, but two policemen. The good news is that she wasn’t drunk or on drugs. We do, however, suspect that her hair bun may have obstructed the view in the Fiat she was driving.

What’s your theory on how it happened?

Clarice, why don’t you come over for dinner?

Image by scriptingnews via Flickr

The next time you get invited out to a dinner party, don’t be so quick to say yes. Instead, take your time and ask a few key questions, such as:

• What should I bring?
• What are you serving?
• What should I wear?
• Do you cook with peanut oil?
• Are you a cannibal?

Our point is, you really should know your dinner host before you accept any invitation. Just ask the man in the the following blog (see link below) who was frightened to learn that he was not invited to be a guest, but rather, the main course. AWKWARD!

Image by JoshBerglund19 via Flickr

What a relief! With all the crappy stuff that our children are exposed to, we were surprised to read this article and to review this chart on the results of a kindergarten career day survey at a school. You know that day when students announce what they want to be when they grow up? (FYI, we’re still waiting to grow up.) As you’ll see from the link below (click on the pie chart), the career choices really haven’t changed much since we were kids — teacher, firefighter,policeman, etc. This is quite remarkable considering the professions our children are exposed to on television. Below is how we imagined the list.

• OctoMom
• Real Housewife
• Girl Next Door
• Professional Letter Turner
• Terrorist
• Hoarder
• The Bachelor
• Papparazzi
• Super Nanny
• Imperfect author/blogger

What do your children want to be when they grow up?

Reference: Kindergarten Career Day Dares Us To Hope For The Future [Kids Today] by

Will Patty (pictured here in Minneapolis with Mary Tyler Moore) make it past May 21 afterall?

Last week, we were in Minnesota speaking for the Autism Society of Minnesota (AUSM) when we decided to spend  time exploring the cultural sights (OK pubs) of downtown Minneapolis. We were amazed at the treasure trove of things we found. “Look Gene! The Mary Tyler Moore statue! Take a picture of me with her!” Once we realized the Minnesota natives were simply friendly and not out to harm us (“Why is that man in the elevator smiling at us, Pat? Dear God, he’s going to kill us right here!”) we felt right a home. Of course, the outside tequila bar we discovered helped put us at ease, especially decision-challenged Patty who couldn’t decide what type of tequila to have in her margarita.

“Here are your three margarita samplers without the margarita mix, Ma’am.”

“You know Gene. I like this City. I could really get used to it.”

We were so comfortable in the city, that we decided to forgo the Mall of America and walk the streets of downtown Minneapolis. We were skipping along when we came across a woman standing on top of a park bench and shouting from a megaphone. “Beware! The End of the World is Coming!” Then she handed us a pamphlet that explained it would be happening in just a few weeks. We were shocked. “May 21st! That’s too soon! I just paid $300 to get my hair straightened,” protested Patty.

Gina was completely disgusted, as well. “Look I just got my daughter back to school after two years. No way am I letting the world end and kill the free time I’ve been dying for.” She then took the pamphlet and threw it in the trash.

“Don’t do that!” shouted the woman on top of the park bench from her megaphone. “We’ll recycle it.” Patty, who was near a tequila-induced coma then asked, “Well if the world is going to end, why do we even bother recycling?”

The woman was at a loss for words. Yes, our not-so-bright Patty had managed to do something that the good people of Minnesota were too polite to do — to shut the woman up.

Sorry if this seems harsh, but as imperfect parents, we just don’t want to to be bothered with all this Doomsday talk, which seems to be everywhere. We face Doomsday every time we see the name of our childrens’ schools on caller ID.

What do you think? Are you tired of listening to the stories of plagues, financial ruin, and devastation? We face devastation all the time. “What! The Pharmacy ran out of Klonopin! What will we do?”

If you’re a parent who feels like you’re on the perfection treadmill with your children, you need to get off, pick up some Bon Bons and read our latest blog for Psychology Today. Check it out.

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/shut-about-your-perfect-kid/201105/is-treadmill-really-good-you.

Be sure to leave a comment so we know you were there.

Image via Wikipedia

After safely returning from a flight from the Twin Cities, we were intrigued by this article about the common practice of loony people attempting to open airplane doors during flights. Thankfully, we have never encountered anyone who has attempted do to this, nor would we ever consider doing it (we can barely figure out how to open the bathroom doors on planes). We suspect the “blabby” flight attendants might have something to do with this, as they are always quick to point out where all the doors can be found.

We actually don’t like sitting anywhere near airplane doors,especially since we found out they usually come with  added responsibilities. “Look, I don’t want the responsibility of sitting in this wing seat. I’m a Libra and indecisive,” said Patty on our last flight after learning she would be responsible for opening the doors in a crisis.

Personally, neither of us enjoying flying; we just like to get it over with. Patty especially. “Alright, close the door. Let’s get this human petri dish in the air so we can get home.”

What do you hate most about flying?

Is it just us or does anyone else smell a rat?

Image by daveparker via Flickr

Bad news for Chuck E. Cheese fans. It appears that another violent act occurred at another one of his restaurants. This time in the parking lot, as a man was shot and killed.  We have to say, we’re not surprised about all the violence that goes on there. Chuck E. is a rat, after all.

The person you don’t need is Nanny McPhee.

Just give the kids some cash.

Image via Wikipedia

There are many struggles involved with parenting. One of the most frustrating ones in our homes is getting our children to go to bed at a reasonable time.  It appears to be a global problem, too. But as the attached article points out, some British parents have the ideal solution – bribery. The blog below reports that “the British company Munch Bunch recently released a study of 3,000 British parents, showing that more than one in five moms and dads resort to bribing their kids to go to bed.” Some of the bribery tactics include:

• Letting kids stay up later on the weekend.
• Letting them watch a bit more TV. (Hmmm, Letterman perhaps?)
• Offering brownies and other sweets (unless they have Sominex in them, this is not a wise decision).
• Signing the deed of their homes over to their children (Ok, we joke, but you get the point).

Have you ever bribed a kid to bed? Come on, be honest.

Image via Wikipedia

If you’re not aware, beautiful Academy-Award-winning actress Catherine Zeta-Jones announced that she has bipolar disorder. Read more about it in the Shut Up About Your Perfect Kid! blog for Psychology Today, entitled “Score One for Imperfection.”

Image via Wikipedia

We’ll admit it. We don’t really have much in common with the Kardashian family anymore. It’s one of the reasons why we no longer try to “keep up” with them. That and the fact their TV show was making us not keep up with other things in our lives, such as housework and food shopping. Today, however, our news alerts turned up a photo/blog that made us realize that we do in fact, have something in common with Kim, the most famous of the Kardashians. Apparently, we wear the same label. Click on the link below to see what it is.

When Gina’s daughter Katie was young, she told her mother that she (Katie) could “do anything she wanted to do if she put her mind to it.” Pretty amazing for a child who struggled greatly with disabilities, including  Asperger’s syndrome, ADHD, and dyscalcula.

The article below about Dannel Malloy, the current  Governor of Connecticut who has dyslexia, proves her point.

By the way, Katie’s never expressed interest in holding a position such as this, though I’m sure she would put her unique spin on things. “I’d like to declare a state of Fashion Emergency. I have nothing to wear to my ball.”

Do you know a special child who has exceeded expectations? Tell us about it.

Image via Wikipedia

“Gina’s sleep program works. I’ve never felt better or been less stressed.

Now what’s this I hear about Libya?”

In her ongoing effort to be healthy and manage stress, Gina has devised a new health program. Remarkably, it’s the only program she’s managed to adhere to. It’s called The Sleep Zone. Whenever things get stressful at home or Gina has an urge to eat something unhealthy, she takes a brief cat nap. The beauty of her program is its portability. She’s taken it to the library while waiting for her daughter to be tutored. (“Ewww Mommy, you drooled on your book.”) She’s taken it on airplanes with Patty.( “Gene, you missed the snack cart twice.”) And pretty much anywhere in the house. (“Look Katie, Mom’s cleaning the oven while she sleeps.”) And boy has she seen results. She’s lost 3 pounds and cut her monthly budget in half since she began the program. “Look, sleep is a powerful and healthy coping mechanism. I’m not eating or spending money or nagging my kids,” said Gina. She particularly loves the weight loss benefits. “Anyone ever see Rip Van Winkle at Dairy Queen?”

Apparently, Gina’s program is catching on. During the recent Presidential address, Joe Biden was in The Sleep Zone. Who could blame him? Talking about the country’s growing deficit is very stressful. (see video below)

What do you think? Could you sleep your way to good health?

If you haven’t checked it out, be sure to read our next blog for Psychology Today. Please feel free to make a comment and to pass the link along to others. The more people who see it, the more opportunity we have to educate others on our special children. Plus, it makes our mother happy when people read what we write.

Image via Wikipedia

“Like Woah! That Applebee’s juice has me on my $#@!’

We guess Applebee’s wasn’t kidding when they came up with their slogan, “Feeling Good in the Neighborhood,” though some of us  foolishly thought they meant the older members of the neighborhood. Apparently not, as a young 15-month-old baby was mistakenly given alcohol in his juice. The baby’s blood alcohol level was .10, which is over the legal driving limit. “This is the Police. Please pull over your Big Wheel now.”

The mishap has also caused quite a stir in homes across America as babies everywhere are standing up, “Wah! Wah! Me want birthday at Applebee’s not Chuck E. Cheese.”

What would you do if this happened to your family? Thankfully the child is alright, although one more trip to Applebee’s and he could be in rehab by 2.

Exciting news for P and G fans (that’s you Mom and Dad)! Last week, we were pleased to unveil our new blog, Shut Up About Your Perfect Kid, for Psychology Today. Yes, you read right. Psychology Today. Now some of you may be wondering what would an esteemed publication such as PT want to do with two imperfect mothers with M Ed., IMPs (masters degrees in Imperfection).

Actually, they wanted to get a unique perspective on raising children with disabilities. And while we may not be the brightest bulbs in the shed (see we can’t even get that cliche straight), we do have a unique perspective — the imperfect one. It seems many parenting advice experts are always telling you the right things to do. We, on the other hand, usually do the wrong thing. But somehow (perhaps through all the rosaries our religious mother says for us and our kids), we’re managing pretty well. Our special kids are making it in the world in their own way. Yes, they are challenged. Yes, they have days when they think we’re “the worst mothers in the world.”  But they are managing their challenges quite well and more importantly, they are offering hope and support for so many special parents and children who feel alone and misunderstood.

While we’d love everyone to love our blog, there are folks who don’t understand us or our kids (“These sisters are looking for attention. Who else would wear Snuggies  in public?” ). A few have even left comments to that effect. We view this as a great opportunity to educate them on the lives of special parents and children. At least they’re not ignoring our kids, which so many people seem to do out of fear or lack of knowledge.  Perhaps we can even bring a few over to our side — the imperfect side.

In any case, we hope you’ll take a look at the blog, post a comment, and share it with your friends, neighbors, family members, milkman, butcher, garbage man, etc. If we can help educate the world about our kids and break stigma, we’re all winners.

Here’s the link.

Reference: Caution! | Psychology Today

Stop leaving stupid posts on our Blog. The first rule of marketing is to know your audience. The Shut Up Sisters  DO NOT suffer from erectile disfunction. We suffer from plain old disfunction. Got it? Good. Now leave us alone.

P and G with Sandie and Judy, two of "The Imperfect Housewives of Illinois"

I’ll admit it; I got sucked in again. Not as bad as last time when I literally got sucked into purchasing a $1,000 vacuum. The saleswoman had me at the dust mite demonstration on my bedsheets.

“I don’t know where they came from. I swear I wash my sheets every holiday season.”

Last night, I was taken in by another season of the “Real Housewives” on Bravo TV, where I was virtually transplanted  into New York high society.

I’m not sure what it is about these shows, which have virtually taken me to Beverly Hills, Atlanta, New Jersey, Miami, Washington, and Orange County, CA,  that continues to lure me in. It’s not because these women are real, because lets face it, many of them have more plastic in them than the Mattel factory.  And it’s definitely not because they are actual housewives. I think to qualify for that, you actually have to be in the house or be able to identify a mop in a police lineup. (“Ewwww! What’s that shaggy thing? Clearly, it needs a hairstylist). In fact, the show would be better referred to as the The Mean Never Home Girls  of New York City (TMNHGNYC). For the most part, all these ladies do is host fancy parties, jet off to exotic locations, drink wine (OK, that part I like), and rip each other apart. Note: My husband likes that part.

“Ooh Gene look. It’s a catfight! Sa-weet!”

While watching last night’s premiere of the The Real Housewives of New York City, I started thinking that these housewives of fortune would probably find the lives of special needs mothers foreign to them. Imagine (if you would) a Real Housewives series about our lives and having them watch us. Here are a few ideas for shows and what they might say if watching them:

• The Real Housewives of Autism. The fashion critics in them would love that one. “Don’t these ladies own any colors other than blue? Come on!”
• The Real Housewives of Tourette’s Syndrome. “Did her kid just say what I think he said? What kind of bad nanny lets a kid say that.”
• The Real Housewives of  Anxiety Disorder. “Wow! And they thought we were bed hoppers. You never know which kid’s bed that mother is going to end up in.”
• The Real Housewives of Non-Verbal Learning Disability. “Did you see the part when her kid got invited to a kiddie ball and brought a ball?”
• The Real Housewives of Oppositional Defiance Disorder. “I can’t believe she picked that boarding school for her kid. They don’t even have any horses.”
• The Real Housewives of Mental Illness. “I thought 9-1-1 was for fashion emergencies?”

What do you think? Would you like to star in one of these shows? What other ideas do you have for shows? I think we’re on to something.

Image by eddie.welker via Flickr

After all these years, they’ve finally discovered a cure. Of course, we’re not referring to a cure for cancer or other life threatening illnesses. We’re talking about a cure for something that has plagued women for centuries — ugly underarms. Maybe we’ve been deluding ourselves, but  neither of us has been that bothered by our underarms. Instead, we’ve focused on other more visible body parts — our thighs, chins, skin, arms, noses, ears, collars, necks, ankles, shins, heels, hips, eyelashes, wrists, nostrils, eyebrows, big toes, knees, ribs, waists, stomachs, hair, heads, yada, yada, yada. Gina is particularly disturbed by her large hands, something she inherited from our father’s side of the family. Even her basketball friends have noticed. “Hey ManHands, you just fouled me.”

What do you think about this underarm breakthrough? Will it take your life out of the pits?

Image by UW Digital Collections via Flickr

We’ve heard this story in a few places, so we’re starting to believe it’s true. According to Weekly World News, a huge three-foot Cobra snake escaped from the Bronx Zoo and is now slithering around the streets of the Bronx. We can’t even look at the photo without reaching for Klonopin (then again, we can’t look at ourselves without doing that). Could you imagine finding a three-foot Cobra in your apartment or home? We wouldn’t know what to do especially since we never learned the flute, nor are we particularly charming.

Gina has been especially terrified of snakes throughout her life. “Pat, I just can’t stand them. Give me a good spider or scorpion any day of the week and I’m fine.”

As a young girl, she couldn’t even watch Sesame Street. “Mommy turn it off! Turn it off! He’s on again!

“Gina Frances calm down, that’s just Sammie the Snake. He’s confessed he’s harmless; he just looks like the letter S.”

Truth be told, she gets a panic attack whenever she sees one on TV or in the woods (where she sometimes finds herself chasing her golf ball).

What kinds of things make you panic?

Image via Wikipedia

Don’t let Ward and June Cleaver fool you; marriage is tough. It’s especially tough on couples who have the added stress of raising children with disabilities. The truth is, men and women handle that stress very differently. In Gina’s home for example, she likes to get everything out on the table, while her husband chooses to bring another method to the table. “Mike, could you please take off that iPod? I was complaining about the kids.”  One of the best ways to deal with stress is to make time for each other. Years ago, Gina and Mike’s  closest friends (both of whom who have been married before) shared one of the keys for their marital success.

“Marriage is hard. You have to constantly work at it,” they said.

“How do you do that?” Gina and Mike asked.

“We set the alarm for 5:30 a.m. every day  and have coffee in bed and talk about work and the kids, etc..”

Gina and Mike were amazed.

“But that’s when Sports Center is on,” protested Mike.

“And I need my beauty sleep. Have you ever seen me in the morning?” protested Gina.

While this method may not be the best choice for Mike and his narcoleptic wife, they have instituted their own solution — date night. Often this involves taking off for a few hours during the weekend alone without the kids, dogs, and carpenter ants. Sometimes, they’ll meet friends for dinner or drinks and sometimes they aimlessly roam the aisles at B.J.’s and revisit their younger days. “What do you say Gene? We’ll buy this pallet of Double Bubble and hide it from the kids.”  They’ve also been known to sneak out for coffee in the evenings when the stress gets really bad. “Mike go tell them you’re getting the mail. I’ll be waiting around the corner to pick you up.”

The important thing is that it’s allowed Gina and Mike to reconnect and talk without the kids, to remember why they liked each other in the first place, and to ensure they maintain a united front with their kids. “Gene, they’re being really disrespectful. Let’s gang up on them.”

What do you think? Are you able to spend any time with your spouse/partner/significant other?  How has it helped you?

The link to the article below provides some helpful insights on ways

We have to admit, we’ve never been huge fans of Barbie. We’d be lying if we didn’t admit that we secretly cheer when Gina’s imperfect dog Candy gets a hold of one. (“Mommy, Candy chewed off all Barbie’s hair!”) It’s just that we find it so hard to relate to a beautiful, thin doll with no body hair and a neck the size of the space needle. The worst part is, she doesn’t even have scars that indicate that she had lipo, tummy tucks, or breast implants.  That’s why we were so pleased to discover a new doll from Mattel — Clawdeen Wolf.  Sure, we can’t relate to her petite figure or flowing hair, but we can relate to the fact that this doll is hairy and requires constant waxing and plucking. Now that’s reality, particularly for those of us of Italian descent.

Of course, parenting experts say the doll sets a bad example for young girls. Who said anything about young girls having one? We’re both buying one for ourselves.

What do you think?